12 January 2009

time and motion study

What a long day! I was able to do everything I had planned, but I really miss him at this time. What would he think about my instinctive answers to some silly questions. I couldn´t evade, he knows that. Although I am a woman, he treats me as if I were a man, unbelievably. I have no idea why. I have already tried to understand but he gaves up, he doesn´t talk to me anymore, he doesn´t comes across suddenly, as an ideal gift, in the middle of night, I had trusted him so much, but he never trusted me. This made me sad many times and now..only now, I strongly believe I gave up before him. It is difficult to understand a timid behaviour. I just wanted to tell him that I had bought a very good book that is making me "understand" him, his strange behaviour, his silence after my words, his anger as reaction to what I always said. Well, I just said many things for him to understand what I was and what I am. However, what was an exchange ideas for me, they were insults as far as he is concerned and Never that I can say will change his stubborn determination to judge me as ignorant. Consequently he ignored me and he has ignored me and maybe I will never talk to him again. He misunderstood everything. While I explained my ideas and personality, he jugde me over and over again until he doesn´t miss me anymore, until he talks to me just 20 minutes, 10 minutes....5 minutes.....1 minute...and then......all the silence is here, although I listen to his songs and feel his smell. Anyway, he just put me in an awkward position. I am really sad, now, because I had a very good day and I just wanted to share with him. I gave up. Good night, my darling! You are always in my heart.

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